I was framed and protecting my legal record was the most important thing i had to do. I was arrested and they lowered the charge 12 days later because the police reports didn't match and they have to match then her statement didn't match as well so the pride had a huge problem to deal with and they had to Lower the charge. I already had double time served so I was walking out the court house a free man either way. We announced ready for trial and at the second trial because she changed the date we were ready again and she didn't show up in fear of the cross examination and we won we beat the case against me and it can't be used against me anywhere for any reason. I was cheated out of my day in court because she didn't show up but I still won. We wanted to get her on the stand but it didn't happen. Now I have the records and the medical information that is enough proof to keep her from getting the kids from where they have lived for the last 8 years and my son is at his own place but my 12 year old daughter is with good relatives and they will take care of her and I don't know if my ex will show up ever but its been nice with out her in my life. The next thing I did was make sure that all of the crazy psych issues had not been properly addressed and she is still a danger to herself and others so I will fight her to keep my daughter where she is at but I am not worried about it because God saw that i didn't take revenge i let him move for me on my behalf and I was facing 5 to 20 years in prison for a crime that was never committed. I didn't know it had been dropped until I was in for 48 days so I worried about nothing and God ran interference for me and got the justice i needed to move on forward from there. I was brain washed into thinking that if anything happened to my wife i was told over and over for years that I would commit suicide like my dad and my grandpa but I didn't and I thought I would be unhappy and that was a lie i was really happy with no option of me going back to the drama. My lawyer moved me into his old office and it had computers and everything I could ever need and I made a recovery kind of slow i drank and went on a binge and then I talked myself out of doing that anymore I stopped that and shifted my focus on learning everything I could about narcissist and I started helping people in about a year in a half closer to 2 years is more accurate. And I have been helping people since and I will continue to be there for the people who are in the dumps i know what it is like. So that's my story thanks for asking this question.

I am currently in no contact and I can say it does always work. For starters, it is honestly the best thing you can be doing. Talking to your ex without giving each other space is detrimental. During that time is when you both are SUPPOSED to work on yourselves and make a decision if you can fix the issues or just call it off entirely. I myself feel that most breakups can be fixed if the work is put in but people choose not to work and just move on. The conclusion of the no contact rule is that either you two will get back together or decide to move on. Of course, you did like I did and show signs of neediness than it may take longer. The best advice is to work on the only thing you can control which is yourself. If that person truly loves you then they will text/call you one day. Keep your head up.

It all sounds like a dream! If you want kids, they want kids. if you dream of owning a boat ...they can buy you one in the future. Ive been there and can spot the BS now. Think dell boy ..Next year Rodney :)

@Pj Thompson This is a complicated topic. And it’s going to get harder and harder as time goes on. I was cyber stalked by my Ex and ended up not using social media, silenced unknown phone calls and blocked aspects of him I was aware of. Its hard! I nkow hoe you feel. its super frustrating. This is my advice: First off: Never, ever, post location information online. If you’re even checking in at the same places infrequently, it might be possible to use that information to ascertain your identity or location. Secondly: If you are currently being stalked, make sure your local law enforcement is notified. Even if it’s just suspicion, you’ll be better off if you file a report. Third: If you think you know the person doing the stalking, make sure you tell someone. And a short list of universal advice: Never put personal contact information in a public place. This includes, but is not limited to: Phone numbers, email addresses, work and home address, and/or vehicle information. Never confirm plans publicly. If you’re meeting friends, tell them directly. Never post pictures of anything you don’t want to be public knowledge. Likewise, never post information you don’t want everyone to know. You will never prevent distasteful people from doing unpleasant things. But you can protect yourself from those things.

It is really good that you are aware of the cause of your nightmares ! Yes you do have to find some effective way of “processing” the trauma. It could be in therapy talking about it. You do not have to remember every last detail or relive every part of every experience but you do have to come to some kind of new level or perspective about understanding your reactions to the trauma(s). There are many great pieces of art by people who “processed trauma” : Novels, paintings, poems, films, performance art, songs and music, etc. If expressing yourself creatively in some kind of art appeals to you, you could try doing that. PLEASE do not use alcohol or other drugs to deal with your trauma. That only make everything worse and you end up with 2 serious problems, instead of one. You might consider educating yourself by reading about trauma treatments. If you want to try therapy seek a trauma specialist, not just anyone.